26 Years Together: The Power of Unity in Marriage

Author: Funmito Obafemi

Published: June 12, 2026

26 Years Together: The Power of Unity in Marriage

We met here in Abeokuta. We approached each other, got talking, and that was how it started, says Samuel

Don’t start a marriage with borrowing. Live within what you have, says Adeola.

On this week’s edition of LoveLens Stories, we spotlight Samuel and Adeola, who have been married for 26 years. Their story takes us through their beginnings in Abeokuta, the importance of studying character during courtship, and the values that have sustained their marriage.

How long have you been married to each other?

Samuel: We got married in August, 1999. That makes it 26 years now.

How did you meet, and what was your first impression of each other?

Samuel: We met in Abeokuta. We approached each other, got talking, and that was how it started.

Was there any character trait that drew you close to each other?

Samuel: Before marriage, there must be courtship. When you meet your future spouse, you have to take the time to get to know them, not just focus on their beauty. You look at the character.

You observe, you learn who the person truly is. After some time, you can then determine whether this is the right person for you.

Adeola: When you meet someone you didn’t know before, and the person is proposing marriage, you have to study them and see how compatible you are. It shouldn’t be because of money.

During courtship, you try to understand each other, and that is where you are both coming from and where you are going.

26 years down the line, what are your favorite things about each other?

Samuel: She is prayerful. She is generous and humble. In marriage, respect is very important. If someone doesn’t respect you, that’s already a minus.

In a relationship, you must be willing to sacrifice, be it your finances or your time. Sometimes, time is even more important. You must be willing to give sacrificially.

Adeola: He is a man who fears God, and he’s respectful. He is supportive, especially when you carry him along in what you want to do. He is also hardworking.

What are the biggest challenges you’ve had in your marriage?

Samuel: We can’t say there has been a major challenge, but in life, there will always be dull moments. We hardly fight, but we tolerate each other.

Quarrels can happen sometimes, but what matters is settling issues without involving third parties such as parents, friends, or work colleagues. The more you involve outsiders, the more complicated things can become.

Adeola: People may try to interfere, but the husband and wife must hold themselves together. You must understand each other to avert unnecessary issues.

You must study each other and know who you are before you study the family, so that if there is any problem at all, you know how to solve it.

What’s your approach to parenting?

Samuel: One thing is that togetherness matters. When correcting a child, our voices must be united. From our side, what they hear from daddy is what they will hear from mummy.

There are no contradictions. Parents must cooperate in training their children and know that whatever their children have done must be corrected.

We thank God that none of our children has gone astray. They know the kind of home they come from. It has become a slogan in our house — “Whatever you are doing, always remember home.” Even if they are far away, they should keep that in mind and avoid pretending to be another person.

Adeola: The family is the first training ground of a child. He/She watches the family’s happenings and will replicate them. We thank God for His help.

It’s not as though we can do it; it is plainly by God’s mercy. It is God who helps one raise a child. Sometimes the child is left alone because you have to work.

We thank God for the children He gave us; they are God-fearing. In their upbringing, we are not alone. Anything they pass through, they carry us along.

We know that when they get married, they won’t neglect their parents, and even without parents, they will share it with those close to them.

What role has faith played in your marriage?

Samuel: One thing is, before entering any relationship, you have to commit everything into God’s hands. He is the foundation, so you shouldn’t try to do everything on your own.

The Bible says that if the foundation is destroyed, which shows that the foundation of any marriage matters a lot.

If the foundation is faulty, it will affect the marriage, but we thank God for His grace. Whenever we decide to do something, we believe. Even when the money is not available, once we agree together and pray, God makes a way.

Agreement matters, and we do things in unity. In the building of the house, anything at all, we have our quota, and with God’s help, things become reality.

Adeola: Being content and avoiding a flamboyant lifestyle, instead of trying to please others, so it won’t affect the marriage.

Who Handles Roles in the Home?

Samuel: We do things together. Sometimes it’s 50–50, sometimes 40–60. It depends on who has the opportunity at the time. Unity and trust matter. If I have the money, we use it. If she has it, we use it. That’s how we’ve paid school fees and handled responsibilities.

We didn’t say that if the other party isn’t putting something down, the intended task won’t hold. That might affect the children and the whole house in such cases. Most of the time, we collaborate to do it. I give her credit because she has been doing her best in that aspect.

Adeola: As husband and wife, you are one. You do things together. There shouldn’t be any reason why you are hiding anything from your partner.

What’s Your Biggest Advice for Married Couples and Singles?

Samuel: In a place where there is no trust, there won’t be love. As much as you don’t trust each other, you can’t say you love each other, but if you trust the person, you love the person. Trust comes first before you can claim to love, and love supersedes all.

In a relationship, what really matters is trust and kindness. Also, both of them must be humble. There should be total submission, especially for the female; having more than your husband shouldn’t give you an edge over him.

Total surrender to your man will make him come down. When the woman starts to raise her shoulders, an inferiority complex might set in.

For singles, there is an adage that says you should look before you leap. They shouldn’t marry someone because they appear financially comfortable. With recent events, some girls just want to enjoy affluence without knowing the source of their wealth.

They must be prayerful as well. It is better to remain single for a while than rush into marriage and regret it later. Parents should pray for their children to get the right partner rather than force them into marriage.

Hidden characters will eventually be revealed even after their pretense while dating. Character is like smoke, and it cannot be hidden forever, no matter how you enclose it.

Even after realizing it, tolerance is required to keep the marriage. Everything about you belongs to your spouse, and denial or withdrawal can sometimes lead you to do the unexpected.

Adeola: Couples should settle their issues together and shouldn’t start their marriage by borrowing just to impress people. They should live within their means. Plan together and share happenings together. Don’t spend everything on the wedding and forget about life after, and learn to adjust to marriage.

For singles, plan your life properly. Have something you are doing, and that applies to both males and females. Don’t marry someone who has nothing to do. Marriage is not a bed of roses, and if your partner has so much, you should support them.

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